Doctors around the country warned today that people who watch NBC's interview with former Vice President Dick Cheney at 10pm EDT tonight could suffer from recurring and severe nightmares, insomnia and violent nausea. Those suffering from existing stress disorders are also at higher risk for heart palpitations and breathless panic attacks.
"We view the likely effects of watching Cheney for a full sixty minutes as being unnecessarily traumatic for most Americans, and likely to produce extreme symptoms similar to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)," said prominent psychiatrist Anil Pora. "While the average American can deal with a loss of their retirement savings, or the destruction of their homes by hurricanes and earthquakes, the effects of watching Dick Cheney for a full hour could be truly devastating," he continued. "We just don't know how people can survive this real-life fear-inducing personality coming into their living rooms ... their private sanctuaries."
Not all people were concerned, however. Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann said that she was "not the least bit troubled. Dick Cheney is a great Vice President, and has been a great Vice President for the last ten years. I am sure that when his term expires, we will all breathe a little easier knowing that he was on the job," said Bachmann.
George W. Bush, who served as President during the administration of Vice President Cheney, said that he would not be able to watch the interview. "I spent eight years--I think it was eight, anyway--having to listen to him. That's more than enough for anyone. Besides, I'm still pissed that he never invited ME to go hunting."